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My Words of Wisdom for the Day

theycallmebetty4 Comments

 

 

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Staring out upon my property this morning a wicked little smile crosses my face. For you see 3 years ago I stood in the very same spot, staring, wondering what to do, where to start or how I could possibly AFFORD to create something viable for our family from this plot of land we own. We asked for advice from “people in the know” and “industry specialists” all which were solely looking out for themselves.  We asked for advice from friends and family members and were inundated with wonderful suggestions as to how we should proceed. But my gut continually said no it wasnt right, (thank you honey for being patient with me) so we waited.  We were offered many different options financially to create and mold our place to look like other places we had seen on television and in magazines. But again procrastination ruled the day, we waited because a little voice in my head wouldn’t let it go, wouldn’t allow me to make a commitment and jump off that financial cliff.

Watching, learning, listening and helping some dear close friends who continually have created the same dream only to rebuild time after time due to unfortunate circumstances was my greatest advantage.  Their wisdom and experience helped shape our priorities and strengthen our resolve. It could be done, it would be done and when we finished, hopefully we wouldn’t owe the bank a dime, we wouldn’t have to worry about making ends meet and we could enjoy the daily fruits of our labor.  It’s taken hard work, the days are long and we have given up a lot of our free time once spent camping, boating, swimming, and fishing to other projects.  WE are nowhere near finished, but standing here today I can see what it will look like when its done.  Something I couldn’t have envisioned before.

There is no place I would rather be on this earth.  No place I would rather call home.  I am surrounded by people I can truly call; My friends!  I am surrounded by a crazy wacky family that drives me insane but I love them more than any words could explain. Now I am surrounded by more horses than I know what to do with, but that’s ok. Each one of them has a personality of their own, each one of them has good days and bad days, each one of them brings the same smile to their owners heart as they do my face.  They all feel like my own and I care about every one of them, they are treated them like family.

So where does all this gushing lead to when it comes to Wisdom?

With hard work comes great reward! If you want it bad enough it doesn’t happen RIGHT NOW, this instant, as so many of our generation believe! You are not entitled to a house, property, a business or even a pot to piss in! What you are entitled to (thanks to God) is the ability to wake up every morning, dust yourself off and MAKE SOMETHING HAPPEN!

Use your brain, sweat, work and extend the muscles the good lord gave you, if you can’t figure it out then ask, read, or take a class! But most of all remember life is hard, it takes hard work and DEDICATION to achieve your dreams. No one and I mean NO ONE is going to drop it in your lap.

Tomorrow if my whole world collapsed that would be fine, I would be sad, but it would still be ok. You know why?

Because the very next day I would get up, dust myself off, thank the good lord for the experience, write out a plan and do it all over again.

If you read these words and take them for bragging, patting myself on the back or gloating then you will never understand who I am as a person, my purpose, or this “wisdom” I have bestowed upon you because you obviously have heard it all before, you know everything and therefore my words have fallen upon def ears.   Just saying…

Carry on that is all…..

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theycallmebetty2 Comments

Love this blog and can completely relate to todays topic! Enjoy!

Grace Danielson Perry's avatarA Confederacy of Spinsters

1950s-pin-up-girlI am girly as fuck.

If you need clarification, since saying something is “as fuck” doesn’t actually fall on a measurable scale, that’s understandable. I enjoy traditionally female attributes and activities. Sewing is my jam, I’d always rather wear a dress, and my Texas sheet cake could win awards. My favorite songs are showtunes and Jane Austen is my fairy godmother. A romantic comedy doesn’t hit theaters, without me buying a ticket. I am girly as fuck.

I am also a feminist.

If your mind didn’t just explode, well done. You’re a rational human being! All too often, this juxtaposition makes people on both sides of the political spectrum itchy. How can you be a true feminist, if you enjoy traditional domesticity?You’re too pretty and happy to be a feminist! Where is your man-hating pant suit? Their faces scrunch up in painful frustration, like racoons touching an electrified garbage…

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My Words of Wisdom for the Day

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Life isn’t a guarantee, live in the moment, open your eyes and find something to appreciate about this very minute.

Example: I am thankful for being able to write this blog, where I want, when I want. Life is great!

Carry on that is all…

My Words of Wisdom for the Day

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When making a decision of infinite proportion the term “sleep on it” is used as advice for the leery. Yet “sleep” never comes, your mind stays “on it” and before long you wish someone else would tell you what to do even though you’ve known the answer all along.
Seems like a waste of a good nights sleep.
Carry on that is all…

A letter from the past…

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letter

1,486 days until 50 years of age.

Recently while rummaging through some old keepsakes I came across a letter.  Now while most of us at some time or another have kept letters from old boyfriends or girlfriends, or  from our parents while we were away at camp, even notes from friends, this letter was a little different.

Wrapped in a dingy standard, business envelope it was thin, wrinkled and worn.  The writing on its face was faded and simple, addressed to me from me.  You see it was dated 1984. Mailed from the office of my old high school, a project straight from the bowels of a creative writing class.  Premise;write a letter to yourself to be opened when you reach 25. Address it to your parents home to ensure you receive it and be “creative”.

Well being the pretentious Teaching Assistant that I had become, the whole thing seemed stupid and as such the writing was poignant to say the least. The letter was all of a 1/2 page written on wrinkled binder paper and said: Well asshole if you are reading this then good job! You made it to 25, now give yourself a pat on the back for still being alive.  Never thought you would make it past 21! You are still a loser. Hope you still have some friends to pester.  Loser!

So what does this all have to do with the price of tea in China and most of all my count down towards turning 50?

The letter drew a sad emotional response. Sad that I wasted a perfectly good opportunity to write something pertinent, honest, heartfelt, whimsical or even just plain factual.  Yet I threw away that time being a punk to myself.  Shorting myself with an alloof flippant attitude towards something that could have captured the feelings of being a teenager in the 80’s.  A paragraph, a page, a note, a quotation, anything to show myself and the world development, growth and the ability to change, adapt and overcome life’s challenges and obstacles. To be able to map a path taken between the age of 17 and 25, from 25 to 46 and into the future.

Then I read it again and you know what, strangely that may be  exactly what I accomplished. Not eloquently mind you but looking beyond that moronic statement to who I was at 25 its there, you just need to read between the lines.  When I was young, I was a know it all, selfish, moody little bitch.  To be quite honest if my 46-year-old persona met my 17-year-old moronic self, I do not think we would like each other very much. I would probably kick my own ass! You see back then if we were friends, I was a loud joke cracking fool, if we didn’t know each other I hung back in the corners like a wall flower scared of his own shadow.  I was a contradiction of introvert and extrovert all rolled into one.  Some days you just never knew who you where going to get. In some ways I am still that way today, with the exception that as an adult hanging back in the corner of the room allows me a few moments to figure out who all the “players” are and how to approach people.

Getting closer to 50 has given me the chance to reflect on my life, where it has been and where it is headed.  I see a lot of the same attributes in my oldest teenage son and I am worried for him.  He is at a stage where emotions, testosterone and the inability to become outwardly friendly towards new people have paralyzed his ability to cope with strange situations.  He is moody and if you are his friend he is the dry witted life of the party, but if he doesn’t know you he clams up and can’t even muster the strength to say a word while he stares at the ground.

Part of me wishes my 17-year-old self could come back to life so he sees there is hope. As his father I want to protect him, but I know he needs to fall on his face to learn how to handle the rough edge of life.  Learning from every encounter, mistake, misfortune and success are the building blocks to a foundation that forms our adult existence.  I don’t know how to bring out the best in him, I don’t know how to tell him I went through all the same feelings as a kid without him tuning me out as his father telling the tale of walking both ways uphill in the snow barefoot to school.

But most of all I don’t want him someday to become mired in the fact he is closing in on 50 years of age  while reading a letter from some 17-year-old asshole known as himself….

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My Words of Wisdom for the Day

theycallmebettyLeave a comment

When working to achieve a goal in todays day and age of instant gratification one thing must always be remembered. Hard work will always bring lasting peace to ones mind, body and soul.  It wont happen instantly, at the push of some electronic button, but after days, weeks and even months of steady resolve.

Just saying..   Carry on that is all….

Time..

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Time is but the click of a second-hand or a slow methodical movement towards an hour. If I could place time in a bottle, would I save everyday until eternity passes away? We tell our children there is plenty of time for this and for that, yet in the same moment we are left gazing, staring upon them wishing we could turn back the hands of time.  Our only wish, to revel once more in their faces so young, so precious, and so innocent.

Time marches on while some take their time, walking to the beat of a different drummer. We can stuck in time, mired in what was, what should have been, what never will become.  Asking for a time-out can bring some form of sanity after re-grouping our emotions, evaluating our actions, our resolve.  Time can be fleeting when surrounded by those who must go, or drag on endlessly when surrounded by those you wish would move on.  There is never enough time during sunlight hours and even less time when slumber must rule the moment.

We must learn how to manage our time, meet a timed schedule, hurry as time slips away, kill time, warrant enough time, track time, watch time fly, waste time, and pass the test of time. Time can become an illusion or merely the furthest distance between two points. Time is seen as an equal opportunity employer, the rich cannot purchase it, while the poor/destitute cannot give it away, for they have nothing but time.   You may find yourself staring blankly into the face of Father time, mesmerized while the hands of time move slowly around.

Time can become a bitter enemy or our beloved friend.   We curse its insistence while cherishing its surrender.  We honor times presence through trinkets and wall clocks that clatter and chine. Gigantic towers, statues and balls that drop at midnight. There are timepieces that glimmer, and digital markers, surrounding us, blaring in our faces at the very turn of a head. Reminding us time is not to be wasted.

What does time mean to me?

It means I am getting older and with time memories fade, my children become adults, my wife looks at me through the same weary eyes gazing back upon her. The lines of time stretched across my face, showing the world I have indeed done my time.

When it is finally time for me to go, will I rest easy knowing I have done my best as a human being while here on this earth? Will I have taken the time to warmly, honestly tell all I have welcomed into my heart that I love them?

Only Time will tell….

What does time mean to you? How do you see time in your life?

theycallmebetty1 Comment

Never ever give up on your dreams, for those who put you down, those who nay say and belittle your minor achievements should only be held for consumption. Fueling the fire that lays inside your belly, pushing you, driving you, leaving you wanting more until success is within your grasp…. Your dream is reality…

My friend Cooper

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We met on a warm spring day in 2001, you had just finished running and were full of energy and enthusiasm. The type of excitement held solely for those coming down from a runners high!  After introductions it appeared immediately as though we would become friends. I couldn’t help but admire your self-confidence, exuberance and ability to charm those you encountered!

Over time we became closer, long walks in the evening, daily runs, outings with the family.  When our eldest son was little and sad, you never balked at an opportunity to cheer him up. Good friends will do that and indeed a good friend you had become.  A look, a smile, some funny movement or action and our son would laugh, all at your expense. You never minded, when your work was done you always left with that sly smile upon your face.  A look that showed you always knew something we didn’t.

And knew something you certainly did, for you have been alongside our children for the last 12 years. Watching them grow, helping with their life changes, attitudes and emotions.  I really don’t know what I would have done without your friendship! Like a rock, steadfast and solid your loyalty never wavered.  There are times in life when no matter what you do as a father you just cant seem to get through, but you always could. With a calm demeanor, a listening ear, and a warm embrace it was always you bringing things into perspective for their little minds.

So what am I to do now?  How do I fill this void you left behind? You have gone and there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. You left us all with broken hearts and endless tears.  Not for the way you left, or even the fact you had to go, but  for our own selfishness.  Our own emotional fulfilment.  The need to feel your love and to give that love in return.  Did I show you enough affection, did I tell you I loved you enough times? I will have to assume yes, as I will never know the true answer.

Yesterday at 7:30pm you took your last breath, heaved your very last sigh, relieving yourself of all the pain you had been carrying inside.  You body could no longer handle an enlarged liver, your kidneys ached under the strain and your legs had finally given to the pressure.  We couldn’t bear watching you suffer anymore as one step meant seeing you buckle under the strain. You were my wifes dear friend and companion, you were a wonderful friend to our children, and you were my friend.  You stood proudly by my side through thick and thin, in the sun and even the rain.  Camping trips, fishing, daily outings, hikes, bike rides, you participated in them all. Always a smile on your face!  You were amazing!

The day we met, my then girlfriend (future wife) had been running with you, you were her young, handsome little pup. Over the years you became one of the most important parts of our growing family, no longer the sole dog, loved by one, but the much-loved, valued member of 4, then 5, and eventually 6 of us. You have slept upon beds of the frieghtened, laid on feet of the cold, awakened us when something just didn’t seem right outside, and even chased off a coyote looking to enter our backyard.  Every Sunday we just knew you were going to catch one of the many Balloons filled with wine country tourists traveling over our house.  If you couldn’t catch a balloon, you dang sure were going to chase it away! You took credit for every one that passed over head and out of view.  There was a time when your speed matched that of the Jack rabbit, catching one only to let it go! Their wasnt a tire on our property that didn’t bear a marking from your superb aim. When we moved to the ranch you took other dogs under your wing and showed them the way.  Blitz misses you now, proof as he laid in your spot last night and would not get up for me this morning.

There are those that say “he was just a dog” but not to us, you were family.  It started the day my wife took you in, trained you and made you her very own. Smothering you in the very same love so easily given back to those you accepted into  your life.  As her family grew, your family grew and it never ended as day after day we always found a way to love you more.

We all miss you Cooper.  You are a symbol of our family. I wish I could bring you back for one last hug but I can’t, it was hard seeing you go, it was even harder burying you under the old tree by the pond last night. I wrapped you neatly in one of your favorite comforters and placed you gently upon your pillow.  A prayer was said and I cried laying the first bucket of dirt upon you.  I hope you like the place we picked, it has a full view of the valley, all the jack rabbits and coyotes but most of all those damn balloons as they pass by every Sunday morning.

May you rest in peace, you were a GREAT dog, the fields of heaven are open just for you.  Your work here is done, and for that we love you and thank you….

Cooper

cooper

1999-2013

 

 

My Words of Wisdom for the Day

theycallmebetty2 Comments

The sanctity of farm life should never be overshadowed by greed, glutton or self importance. Because as any of us who live on farms know all to well; you will never get rich farming, the animals always need more than you and there is absolutely no one standing around for you to impress.  Its perfect…  

Thank you God for bringing me home…. Carry on that is all….